The nightmare reality is now two months old. Or two months young, depending on how it relates to the total of the time I have left. 40 or 50 years, if I continue to do all those things you do to have a long life? Is that how long it will last?
Nothing and no one person can imagine what you are personally experiencing. You seem to like the words on a page, and I have this great little book that I have turned to when I have lost loved ones. It's called "Safe Passage" by Molly Fumia. One of my absolute favorites is quoted here."The temptation is to allow death to claim more than it's share, and leave us to our anger and powerlessness. The challenge is to engage in life again with renewed energy, and embrace the new days with a gentle, welcoming spirit." I think you are already embracing life again and that embracing will fill your days with the gentle memories of your loved one. My best thoughts go out to you as you have many gifts to share and that gifting spirit will fill your days. I wouldn't start thinking years yet. It might just be too tender and too soon. One day at a time is good for now. PF
Polly Springhorn is a composer, performer, and improviser based in Oakland, California, USA. Equally at home in the worlds of free improvisation, composition, rock, and choral singing, she is a member of the duo B Experimental Band, Usufruct,Ghost in the House, and Reconnaissance Fly.Her compositions and flute choir arrangements are available fromALRY Publications.
Polly is also a graduate student pursuing an M.Div. in Theology and Religious History at Cherry Hill Seminary.
5 comments:
I promise you, it will get easier. It's not 40 or 50 more years of this.
you will not always feel like this. cross my heart.
From your mouths, to the Goddess' ear...
Nothing and no one person can imagine what you are personally experiencing. You seem to like the words on a page, and I have this great little book that I have turned to when I have lost loved ones. It's called "Safe Passage" by Molly Fumia. One of my absolute favorites is quoted here."The temptation is to allow death to claim more than it's share, and leave us to our anger and powerlessness. The challenge is to engage in life again with renewed energy, and embrace the new days with a gentle, welcoming spirit." I think you are already embracing life again and that embracing will fill your days with the gentle memories of your loved one. My best thoughts go out to you as you have many gifts to share and that gifting spirit will fill your days. I wouldn't start thinking years yet. It might just be too tender and too soon. One day at a time is good for now. PF
Thank you very much for the tip.
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